Ice Skating in Ditches, The Wife is Encouraging it.

So, there's been no snow for the month of January. Though we have had rain. When the temperature gets cold enough, the ditches freeze. For the children(ours) who are used to the frigid windmills of Wisconsin, and having ponds, lakes, and frozen fields...they find any hint of frozen water to play on. Hence the gravitation to the frozen ditches.
They were supposed to be doing chores...instead they were skating down a half mile of frozen ditch. Then there were the races. Obstacles of tree trunks, cattails, and drain pipes making the race that much more exciting. However, my personal favorite was "ditch wars". Where the sisters stand on the road and pelt brothers with whatever alongside the roadside they skate down for the best time. A little much like some sort of survival games movie...but it kept the occupied on a dreary day for three hours! Outside the house!
The chores had to get done before they came inside...giving me an extra half hour of a clean house!
I love ditches!

To Mow a Lawn

The Keeper of the Flame has had the esteemed job of mowing the lawn. Not just your average postage stamp of grass, but rather a couple acres. By push mower.
As parents we were super impressed with our forward thinking that the mower we gave him to push is gas powered. The Keeper of the Flame dilligently pushed for three weeks of the July heat index beyond 100F. The lawn is large enough to make it divisible into five smaller parts so that it was five days of an hour or two of lawn mowing. Small complaints were breathed, but no large blow-ups. And then the day came when the request was made, "I don't need any birthday gifts. Save the money to buy a riding lawnmower." This is the way to any mother's heart, through humility and self denial. Willing to give away all worldly pleasures for a simple riding mower with which he could bless his parents and continue to cut the lawn. So when the neighbor was selling his riding mower, the Wife was willing to pay whatever he was asking for her dear sweet boy. The haggle was short, and the mower drove to its new home. At dinner that night the conversation was light and good humor abounded. Tomorrow the Keeper of the Flame would be cutting the full lawn in one day. Everyone was jovial! Soon the conversation became something new to the Wife's ears..."Hey, Pop! Could we hook up a trailer to the mower to haul water buckets?"
...Such a thoughtful son, she thought, helping do his brother's chores...
"Pop, I could drive the mower to weed the bean field with the neighbors.."
...ahh, everyone should have a son so willing to be a blessing to everyone...
"and we could hook a trailer up to the back for the canoes going down to the canal, maybe we could tweek the engine to go a little faster? How do we lift it for four-wheel drive? do you think I could drive it to the gas station to get ice cream?"
...eh?...who's child was this?
And this was when the Wife realized...she had just bought her son his first vehicle...which just happens to cut the lawn.

(He is still a sweet boy, thoughtful, and diligent.)

The Adventures of Dear Farmer and Indoor Plumbing

Disclaimer:this is probably one of the more disgusting posts. But in our family everything is shared news. Everything! It is part of Dear Farmer we love. However, the Wife does not believe that this is part of country hospitality....though, should you visit, you should know this beforehand.


No, We do not have an outhouse. Yes, we do have indoor plumbing. However, we have the indoor plumbing from when indoor plumbing was first made. And then in the ninteen sixties someone thought it looked old, put a new pink face on it, and made it appear hip and trendy.
A mere fifty years after the facelift, the bones of the original plumbing are brittle and clogged...and needing replacing.
Insert Dear Farmer's newest adventure...indoor plumbing.
To give Dear Farmer more time to research the "how to" his family has come up with a jingle you might have heard in a playground, " If its yellow, let it mellow. If its brown, flush it down." This is the core of playground humor, and reality in this old farmhouse. Well, reality until Dear Farmer has figured out how to fix and replace the old plumbing.
Insert the family joke: "but what do you do if its green?"
Now you can screw up your face, giggle and laugh. But really...what do you do?
Here in lies the adventure every time we open the toilet lid. What did the person who used the bathroom before you do? What did they do with the green?

What I Like About You!!!

It is one of those things that bring a farmer great joy, to be able to show you what he has accomplished.

Our family identifies itself as "Faithful Stewards". So as the Pied Piper is learning to fill the water buckets without complaining, he is listening to the Wife explain how this job is so important as a faithful steward of the animals, but also this family. Yesterday he did the job entirely without complaining! Recognition was given in front of everyone at the dinner table. He had accomplished something he will be expected to do every day forever...hopefully there will be recognition thirty years from now. 

Dear Farmer does the dull work every day. Make soy meal...move fence...weed wack. And here we tell you about it. And (joy!) you read it!!!

Its one thing we like about you...

Just two small words...manure fork

Excited the children with a manure fork this week. It's what Dear Farmer and the Wife picked up on their date...because we know how to thrill our children.
When they rush downstairs(because they aren't actually sleeping when we walk in from our date late night) and the question is "what did you bring me?" They were all just hoping we would say "a manure fork", I am so sure!
Shoulders slump, feet thump back upstairs, certainty that the other shoe will drop in the morning, they trudge back upstairs to bed.
With no messing around, the Wife got people moving into chores the next morning. Take that brand new shiny manure fork to the barn, she told the WhizBang!Farmer's Daughter, and clean the floor.
About half way through the job a tragedy struck. The locking nut fell off disconnecting the tines from the handle. And the nut was lost! WhizBang!Farmer's Daughter concealed her joy and delight well as she broke the news to the Wife. The manure fork would remain new and relatively shiny until a new nut could be bought.
Not to fear, the Wife still has the old pitch fork. The job isn't nearly as neat as it would have been with the manure fork, but it'll work.
The floor of the barn is now clean and fresh. Next date: locking nut for the manure fork. And this time, we'll tighten the nut before chores.

Heat, Humidity, and the Search for Water

One thing that you will never hear the Wife complain about is heat or humidity.  Yea, she's one of THOSE people. The rest of the family, however, has no qualms about letting you know exactly HOW hot they are, HOW liquid they feel, or HOW miserable they anticipate the next hours to be.
So, when the weather turned to full blast summer with a hundred and fifty percent humidity, and the family began melting they made their feelings known.  The Wife learned several facts that had apparently escaped previously...like: we do not own a pool and the cattle tank we have is not big enough for more than one big teen-age body, or two small children.  We do not have air conditioning...anywhere. We do not have a trampoline. And dinner is always HOT! { O the horrors of life, the Wife had no idea.}
The Wife made one of those verbal suggestions that she made regret later in life...she said, "Stop complaining and figure out how to survive."  Which the children did a few days later, while cousins were in town...
They went on a walk...to the canal...and jumped in.
(Can you do that?) 
The reviewers were raving, "This is great!"  "Water!"  "We won't die!"
The Wife had forgotten, she is a water-girl, the children were all raised at the beach. So, now, in the middle of a corn field, it should not have surprised her that all her children were in need of a good dunking.  They were parched.
The canal isn't what the Wife would have chosen to jump into.  The Wife prefers clear water...she's a lake snob. But the children don't care. 
Dear Farmer and Honorable Son No.2 were impressed with the ingenuity of the children.  They think it's a great idea!  So much so, that when they come home from the feed mill, coated in soy-meal, they grab their towels and a bar of soap and down to the canal they go! 
The Wife...she's not jumping in.  She did, however, pack up all the children and drive three hours to the lake.  She sat on the beach with her toes wiggling in the water(she could see her toes in the water!) and enjoyed the beauty of the water.  The cooling and beautiful water...while the children all jumped in and splashed!

Well, Hello Dolly!

Introducing the Newest Members of Foundation Family Farms...

"Dolly"-our someday milk cow-currently a three month old hefier calf. She's a Jersey-Angus Mix, given to us by dear friends.
Under her is "Chili Pepper" and in front of them is "Cayenne Pepper" our two newborn goatlings from mother "Paprika". They were born July 13 during dinner.  It was great fun to hear and see the excitement of all the children knowing that "Paprika" was giving birth while we were eating.  Dinner was a good excuse to get everyone out of the barn so she could have a little privacy, also.  When we were done eating everyone hustled out to see not just one baby, but two! 
It seems that the three have formed the "Future Milk Suppliers" Club.

So, come on down to the farm! The little kids are curious to meet you!